Ironman or Die: So You Want to Tri?
Triathletes are a special breed, so swim, bike, run, or get out of the way
by Lesley Hilts
Certainly there will be obstacles and challenges on the way to the finish line. The swim lap can be the most intimidating part of the race, depending on the size of the race or the wave you are in. You have to watch out for the perpetually blind and the overzealous, who are as likely to swim by you as over you. Aching buttocks and chapped thighs aside, the whole bike-to-run maneuver can tax the limberest of individuals. It often takes one or two miles before your legs stop wobbling and trying to leap out from under you. Whatever you choose to do, Olympic distance or sprint triathlon, never let anyone tell you that you are not a triathlete. It takes a special brand of person willing to complete a swim, bike and run race all at once, no matter what the distance. If someone asks, “Do you tri?” proudly shout “Yes, I do!”
I am sure there are people out there who firmly believe that unless you complete an Ironman triathlon you are not truly a triathlete. Of course, these same people probably never spent their weekend nights arguing with the ice cream in the freezer either. “Come to me, you weak, flabby person. Come to me and drink of my deep, creamy richness.” No, the Ironman-or-die crowd thinks tracking minute food intakes at five minute intervals (e.g., “swallowed two tablespoons of coffee with .06 milligrams of organic honey harvested from free range bees at 9:15:03 a.m.”) to be the hallmark of the “true” triathlete. They track their split times with the fanaticism of an aesthetic at prayer and melt down if they gain a couple of ounces before the race. Lest you think that I am: a) making fun of Ironman triathletes (I am), or b) think they are insane (I do), or c) making this up (I am not), please feel free to join me the next time I register Ironman triathletes for a race or (God save my soul) assist my brother again on one of his training loops.
So what if you are one of those people whose idea of a good time does NOT consist in figuring how to urinate without losing bike or running time? Well, there are shorter triathlon distances out there. You can tackle the half-Ironman, the Olympic distance or the sprint. The Ironman requires a 2.4-mile swim, 112-mile bike ride and a 26.2-mile run; the half-Ironman splits that distance. The Olympic is half as long as the half-Ironman (1-mile swim, 26-mile bike ride, 6-mile run), and the sprint is even shorter with a 1/2- mile swim, 13-mile bike ride and a 3-mile run. Some race organizers, catering to the couch-potato crowd, offer even shorter sprint distances. One caveat: the sprint moniker can be misleading. I have completed many sprints and I can assure you that no sprinting occurred. A lot of gasping for breath, spitting out of seaweed and stumbling from bike to land, maybe, but no sprinting (at least not during the almost two hours it took me to complete the blasted thing). If you want to tri, there are numerous race options out there depending on your determination, pain threshold and insanity factor.
If you are convinced that a triathlon is definitely NOT in your future, feel free to stop reading now. Ready to tri? Read on. You will need to gather equipment and carve out some time. Realistically, give yourself at least three months to train for your first triathlon; longer if you are doing an Olympic or half-Ironman. Most Ironman participants devote at least an entire
year to their training, which is where the insanity factor becomes REALLY helpful. If you cannot imagine spending 6-to-8 hours on your bike at one time, Ironman is probably not for you. Try the shorter sprint or Olympic distances first. The weekly time factor may vary, but generally expect to devote at least four to five hours a week for training.
Then there is the matter of equipment. If you have a lot of disposable income and you think this might be something you would like to continue, by all means have yourself outfitted at your nearest bike or triathlon shop. Otherwise, you can beg, borrow or steal, although I would only advise the latter if you are unafraid of a stint in the local slammer. You can do a sprint triathlon in an old swimsuit (wet suits are only necessary if you are swimming in really cold water), on any type of bike (road, mountain, hybrid) and with
any type of shoes (although I highly recommend running!). You will also need towels, water, a swim cap and a bike helmet (required for all triathlons). There are many other items that make the triathlon experience much easier, but I would not advise purchasing a lot of equipment at first unless the tri bug truly bites you.
If the idea of completing a triathlon alone overwhelms you, find a buddy to join you or sign up with a group. Two to consider are Moms in Motion (there are local chapters all over the nation and they frequently train together for races), and Team in Training (you have to raise a certain amount of money, but they help you train), or drop in at your local bike or tri-shop to see if they offer any first-time triathlete training. There are new triathletes coming on board all the time, so do not be afraid to ask around and see if someone wants to join you. I did my first few triathlons by myself and, while I enjoyed them, I much preferred later races when I was joined by friends who shared the pain and the glory of finishing the race with me.
Resources
Colorado Triathlon Club
www.coloradoathleticclubs.com
Mile High Multisport
http://milehighmultisport.com
Moms in Motion
www.momsinmotion.com
Team in Training
www.teamintraining.org
Tri Babes Training
www.tribabestraining.org
Tri for the Cure – August 2, 2009
www.triforthecure-denver.com
USA Triathlon Event Calendar
http://www.usatmembership.com/
EventCalendar/default.aspx